


To Love A Star But Be Fearful Of The Night.

by TransgirlCowboy



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: F/F, Gen, POV Catra (She-Ra), POV Third Person, The one where Catra reflects on her fucking life, You cant avoid your problems forever
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2019-11-11
Packaged: 2021-01-28 21:51:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21399220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TransgirlCowboy/pseuds/TransgirlCowboy
Summary: Catra looks into the darkness and at the stars.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Catra/Scorpia (She-Ra)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 24





	To Love A Star But Be Fearful Of The Night.

Catra had always preferred the night to the day.

It was what she grew up in, as the brightest it ever got in the Fright Zone was a hazy orange or pale brown. The Fright Zone’s constant expulsion of smoke and gas poisoned the sky for decades before Catra had ever been born; A tainted sky was all Catra had ever known. But while the day was unremarkable, Catra's memories of the nights in the Fright Zone were the fondest.  
While the smoke and gas caused the day to become foggy and gloomy, the nights became pitch black. The darkness in The Fright Zone was pervasive and suffocating for many; but to Catra it was comforting. The night allowed Catra to escape Shadow Weaver's torture, disappearing and escaping with relative ease. The pure darkness allowed Catra to sneak around totally unseen, offering some slivers of happiness in her otherwise troubling childhood.

After Adora left, Catra nearly fell apart. Through it all, the night kept her together, quelling the tempest of emotions inside her. In her childhood, the night allowed Catra to escape her problems. Now, Catra used the absence of light to escape herself, leaving everything behind. Gone from who she is, Catra could feel peace for first time in months. If only for a moment, Catra could leave behind all the problems in her life, the mess it'd become, only to return upon the opening of her eyes.  
After Adora, She-Ra, the Portal, Entrapta, Scorpia, after everything.  
Catra would always have the night.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — —

“All creatures, no matter how small have a place in service of Horde Prime.”

— — — — — — — — — — — — — —

With a familiar sound, the entrance to her cell slid closed and the way out was gone, leaving Catra alone on Horde Prime’s ship.

Examining the room, Catra was eerily reminded of her childhood sleeping quarters. With the resembling bed and four walls, she figured that Ex-Hordak imitated his brother in more ways than one. The uneasy familiarity seeping in, Catra found herself back where she started, with less than before.  
Catra let out a deep sigh, collapsing upon the bed in restrained frustration. Her entire conquest, her mission to conquer Etheria, to defeat She-Ra was over in an underwhelming fashion. Everything she’d done, all the sacrifices made…

Her face still in a pillow, Catra absentmindedly dragged her claws across the wall above her bed, the metal hissing as they carved through the metal. Catra scratches with no reservations, her face deep in the pillow in hopes that she’ll possibly just suffocate. She lay expressionless, unfeeling until a moment of concern dawns upon her. Her claws rake the walls and feel a button.

Sitting upwards, Catra looks at the panel and finds two buttons side by side. With nothing else to do but wait, her curiosity gets the better of her as she presses the left-most button. Instantly, the light in the room shuts off, leaving Catra in pure darkness. Even in her situation, the small pleasure calms her, allowing revel in shadow.

Closing her eyes, Catra left herself, disappearing into the dark. In this darkness, Catra was no longer in Horde Prime's ship, trapped in a cage she led herself to. She was no longer the now-erased Hordak's Second in Command, no longer the conqueror of Etheria, no longer the person who had no one.

Instead, she was loved, wanted again.

Even in pitch black, Catra could tell she was somewhere else, feeling the warm rock beneath her feet, the sweltering heat descending from above and the winds of sand scarring her face, Catra could tell she was somewhere else. She felt herself mov- no, be moved by someone. A big hardened claw tugged on her shoulder and pulled her forward, pulling her into a bustling area with scowls and grunts filling the air. She could taste a drink shared between the two, She let out a sigh of relief from her drink; at the time it was thought to be the taste of power touching her lips, but now was much fonder, more intimate, sweeter.

But then suddenly she felt herself go someplace else, traversing years in mere moments. Suddenly, she felt colder, the air filled with smoke that choked her lungs. Just as she began to instinctively retch, her body began to slip off the edge of a platform. With a frightened hiss and the standing of hairs on ends, Catra scurried back onto the platform. Realizing that she is far above ground, Catra began backing up onto firmer territory, searching for something to grab hold onto. Just as her heart pounded beneath her chest, she felt her claws find purchase on something soft, warm...?  
Catra felt a hand graze her fingertips, hairless, gliding across the top of her fur before finally settling down on her palm. Without even seeing her, Catra knew who she was holding onto, and her heart stilled. Catra's senses flared up, nearly overwhelming if not for her lack of sight. Even so, without her sight Catra felt more than comfortable navigating the moment. The brush of loose blond hair tickled Catra's nose, the length of her hair unknown to anyone who wasn't Catra. Feeling herself high above the ground, Catra's posture eased and let her feet dangle below, her tail swaying gently in the breeze. Her hands planted on the platform beneath her, Catra heard the distant sounds of machinery, labor, terror, and conquest. From where she sat, all those things seemed so small compared to...  
Catra's grip on the hand tightened, only for the hand to tighten in response. The sensation caused Catra to erupt in raspy high pitched laughter. Catra's hand felt rough in the palms and sharp in the claws, but somehow the soft warmth from the hand made her touch tender. Nearly interlocking fingers with her, Catra felt her head shift towards the hand's owner. If Catra could see, it might've been too much, but for now she could handle the memory. Without sight, Catra could feel the warmth of her smile radiate upon Catra's face, her heart beating once more, but not in fear. Catra could stay in this moment forever, their hold on each-other unbreakable. Feeling her tail sway closer to the hand's owner, Catra obliged, moving closer and feeling her head press upon her Shoulder. Slowly, they moved closer together, Catra entranced by the feeling. The comfort, safety, and assurance that Catra was wanted, had someone of her own, that she wasn't alone. The feeling felt like home, and she'd never part from it again.  
Catra had forgotten what happiness felt like.  
That is, until now, their bodies and hearts together as one, as the blonde haired feeling of home subtly invited her to go the rest of the way. Her senses so deeply embedded in the moment, she felt her heart, beating wildly and unabashedly, bleeding passionate, ready to take the invitation, ready to go further...

And suddenly she remembered, and her beating heart turned to stone, and her bleeding heart froze over, chilling her to the bone, hurting in the place she hadn't acknowledged for so long. Now her hands felt numb, frozen, pressing tightly on the cold metal shaft of a pipe, purple hair, snagged onto its end. Her hearing was overpowered by sounds of someone being dragged away, the swish of the wind as someone turns to walk away, and the piercing truth of four words.

"You're a bad friend."

Slamming her fist into the wall, the lights come back on in a jolt, leaving Catra reeling with pain as she is temporarily blinded. She gasps for air and thumbs her palm as it throbs from the pain of hitting metal. Catra falls back into her pillow once more, her eyes wetting the fabric and her fur all the same. She pressed her face into the pillow to quiet her heart, to deafen herself to her weakness, flaws, and mistakes.

**Author's Note:**

> Howdy y'all!
> 
> After watching Season 4, I had a burning desire in me to write some fic for it, and Catra always gives the most heartache so it had to be her.
> 
> Hopefully y'all will tell me what you think? This is my first real foray into writing fic (I'm gonna update my Red Dead fic soon, I promise) and want some feedback! 
> 
> This is only gonna be a two parter because I wanna keep it small as I'm still learning how to write fic and also got other life things to do.
> 
> Happy trails and see you when I next update! (I'll try to finish this by the weekend? We'll see how that goes)
> 
> Sincerely,  
June, (OwOdotexe)


End file.
